All of my children are 'good' children. They say please, and thank you, and yes ma'am and no sir and they sit at the table and eat with a fork (usually!) and they do their chores and mind their elders.
Rarely, yes, very rarely, but sometimes there comes a time when they turn into little hooligans who do not do what they are told, and they wake the baby and they don't eat their dinner nicely and they fight with their siblings and they throw things and scream and kick and yell and holler and create such a fuss that I wonder whose child they really are because they certainly can't be mine!
And so, they are sent to their room and told that it is bed time.
They put on their pj's and brush their teeth and go potty and wash their hands and face.
And they don't let Mommy or Daddy say their bedtime prayers because they scream and holler and yell and kick and so I stand at the door and say 'God bless my little one and give her peace' and I shut the door.
And then this child, whom I love dearly, screams and cries and I say to her that she needs to stop because she is going to wake the baby again and she still cries and screams.
And so I tell her she needs to stop NOW and that I am going downstairs and if I hear her and if I have to go back upstairs, then she will have to get a spanking.
And she says she doesn't want a spanking and she repeats to me what she has to do to NOT get a spanking and so I leave the room and make my way back down the stairs only to hear the weeping and gnashing of teeth continuing to come from her room.
And so I have to go back up the stairs and make good on my promise because what weight does a promise hold if you do not follow through with it?
And so a fanny gets swatted and more tears get shed and a firm get in bed is said...again...and the door is closed and my weary bones slink back down the stairs and I hear...
The sawing of logs?
Why does this sweet child of mine push the envelope so far? Why is it necessary to go to the most base levels of discipline in order for this child to find her peace and rest?
I do not beat the child. I swat her fanny with my hand so that it probably stings a bit, but no marks, no red welts, just a smack.
So why does she need this? Why do hugs and calm words of I love you and Sleep well, my love and Let's try again tomorrow not work?
So maybe now, just to ensure a good day and a good night, I will smack her a good one every morning upon arising and every night before bed...you know, just for good measure.
I'm kidding, of course. I would not do that. I do not punish with no crime.
(Although my mother used to say, if we swore that we were not responsible and that we should not be punished for whatever crime it was that we were being accused of, that perhaps we didn't do it this time, but that she was sure that there were plenty of times when we did stuff that we got away with so it all evened out in the end. Well, I must say that MY end didn't agree with that...)
Anyway, I just don't understand this offspring of mine.
Does anyone else have encounters like these?