Today was Jo's second gymnastics class. We had spent some time in the last few days talking about the class and what she thought of it, and what she should expect from it again. She had said that she liked it and that she liked the other kids who are in it, (who are all younger than her since they don't have a homeschool class, so these are kids that are not yet kindergarten age) and she likes the teacher. She just said that she felt new and felt as if she didn't belong there; like she shouldn't be there. We talked about how sometimes we all feel that way in a new experience, but that with time, you can feel more comfortable, and we also talked about how a lot of the other kids in her class are new, too, and how she really does belong there just as much as anyone else.
And she was super excited to go to class this morning.
But then, things kind of fell apart again this afternoon. She didn't want to learn her AWANA verse. She couldn't concentrate on it. Usually she has no problem memorizing the verses very quickly, but she just couldn't get her head around it today.
Then, she had a crying and screaming jag in the car on the way to AWANA. She wanted one of the other kids in the car to quiz her on addition problems with some flash cards that she had, but they wanted to help her with her verse while she did that...one math problem, say the verse, then another math problem. Jo has having none of that. She was also upset about what was playing on the radio and whatever else she wanted to get upset about.
When we got to the 'safety' of the church, she was fine, and she managed to eat her dinner and say her verse in AWANA with no issues, but in the car on the way home, she had a problem keeping her hands to herself and keeping her voice at a normal car noise level rather than just screaming at the top of her lungs.
I am so frustrated! Mostly with myself. I mean, I really want her to be able to continue at this gym. She seems to have a talent for gymnastics, and the price is discounted right now, and I think that if I were to talk to my brother, I might be able to convince him to invest in her and pay for at least a few months of classes, but I'm not sure that it's the best thing for Jo. So, here I am, projecting what I want on her and not accepting the fact that she is the way she is and no matter how much I desire for her to be able to handle these things, it just may not be something that she can do.
So, I guess I will let her finish out the last 2 classes and let it go. She definitely likes it, but if it makes her and all the rest of us miserable for the rest of the day afterwards, I guess it's just really not worth it. And I can't keep denying that this is her reality for right now.