Psalms 51:10
A psalm of David
Create in me a pure heart, O God
and renew a steadfast spirit within me.
The sun struggles to shine as she bends her curly head over her job, just as my heart struggles to find peace.
The day has not been a good one for me. The walls of boxes are closing in on all of us and tempers are high because it seems that there will be no respite, and fear creeps up and wraps its cold, unforgiving fingers around my heart. How can I show love and patience to my children when I can't find peace inside myself?
It is that time of year again. The time of year to sow new seeds and to sow new hearts.
I pray just, as David begged of God in Psalm 51, that God will create a new heart in me and renew a steadfast spirit within me. Please Lord, I want to be steadfast; an unmoving pillar that does not stray from Your holiness.
My small one leans toward me to pluck the seeds from my hands just as she plucks at my heart and my emotions. These seeds will feed her later in the year with fresh, body-nourishing food. Please, Lord, let the peace, love, joy and spiritual training that I give her now feed her spirit in the years to come.
But she can't do it alone, and she looks to her ever patient grandmother for help and approval. Just as we all need someone to lean on now and again and we all look for approval. As she grows, I pray that I can turn her eyes to look for approval from God, not from man, who will surely lead her astray. Please God, help me to fix my eyes more firmly on You so when my children follow my gaze, You are who they see.
Such a big job to tend all these little seeds with which she has been entrusted...with which I have been entrusted. My children, tender saplings, on loan to me for just a short while from the Creator.
Lord, please help me to teach them well, to warm them with your Words, to place them in fertile places where they will have full potential to grow and bloom and produce much fruit.
Our little ones...so easy to please with a loving word and acknowledgment of a job well done.
Lord, during this Lenten season, please let me find in my heart the courage to ask for and to share the forgiveness and patience that You have shown me over and over. On my knees I beg you to give me the strength to endure and take one more step and as I reflect on the steps you took to that hill so long ago.
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